For years, I waited for this day to come. Soon I will turn 50.
Finally, I can have myself check for this disease that’s been a threat in my subconscious.
When I reached 45, I asked the doctor if I can have it looked at. A simple mammogram that can tell me, if I have a tumor or any cyst that can possibly be present and visible.
‘No, you have to wait,’ was the usual answer I received.
Now the time has come. I dragged my feet to get to the hospital. That feeling when you are ready for labor and yet comes all the demons that’s just lurking on your head.
The many ‘what if’s‘ scenes roaming around the peripheral of your brain.
I was shaking like crazy. My husband was not much of a help since he decided to have his moment of tantrums.
tWhich made me the more worried. I felt like I’m going to cry. I was sweaty and nauseous. Maybe he’s just feeling what I feel. But he can’t show it to me.
But no! I chose to show courage.. Compared to the lion with no courage in the ‘Wizard of Oz,’ I have to face my own battle. No one can do it for me, BUT MYSELF.
And to think that was three weeks ago. My very first mammogram.
©photo of my x-ray results taken by me/zienna@mothers
I can smile, I am on top of the world. That’s just for the moment. Who knows what lies ahead.
Today, I am fine. My results came negative. Although I heard some cousins had chemotherapy and such. I am free at the moment.
I can face the day with so much courage, hope and free of fear . All I have to do is look after myself. Be active, do my exercises, eating good food, helping others and a lot of fresh air.
And be among people who has a positive disposition. And most of all thank God for the Gift of Wellness.
Yes, soon , I will face my 50th and truly it’s a life that will begin at 50.
Have you had your mammogram lately? Can you name two things that scares you the most?